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Post by beksnjake on May 30, 2012 5:24:12 GMT
I'm a happy hacker these days (well trying to be again!). Like you quest we originally went down the dressage route but like you I found the warm-up arena a nightmare. Hated competing because if my marks didn't improve on a weekly basis I got a bollocking from my instructor. Eventually found the strength to change instructors but the damage was done & I stopped competing. I have entered a couple of very low key local dressage competitions since but as soon as the bell goes my stomach sinks, I freeze mentally & so ride like a complete idiot. Same with showing.
Like you Parelli showed me what I felt to be better way with horses when I discovered it in 2000, moving on with Silversand over the past 4 or 5 years has been brilliant for Jake & me. The problem with my confidence has always been there right from when I first learnt to ride in my late 20's and it has been a constant struggle. The instructor who used to tell me off for "poor" dressage marks once told me I was the bravest rider she knew, not her sisters who regularly competed at Hickstead etc. because unlike them, I rode with fear. Guess that was a compliment of sorts.
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Post by beksnjake on May 30, 2012 15:11:29 GMT
A mixed bag today. Went on what is usually a favourite ride of mine, but half way through started to get a little edgy & some negative thoughts started creeping into my head. So worked hard on my breathing & remaining in control. Jake was of course the perfect gentleman. He was a little spooked by a field of young cows not sure why as he has ridden past fields of cows 100's of times. Josh led all the way home which was pretty cool for him Only slight problem was a stone obilisk thing someone has put at the edge of their driveway - both horses had eyed it with suspicion on the way out, but Josh took great exception on the way home, caught mum out, spun and cantered off up the road. Jake wanted to follow but I said "no - I'm in charge and you're staying with me" - he said "OK boss" As soon as I heard Josh's feet stop, I hopped off Jake and once mum got back with us I led Jake past the offending object. I then sat on it and Jake came & examined it whilst I scratched him. Josh was still a little unsure but walked past. I then had some problems finding a bit of verge high enough for me to get back on Jake - I only need something 8 or inches high but its makes all the difference! We then rode home. Now at work for 2 days so Jake will have a break, not sure just how much more rotund he will be by Saturday though - I have to warn you all before the clinic that he is looking very well at the moment ;D
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Post by snigsby on May 30, 2012 21:16:40 GMT
Well,actually, I have to say that if someone replaced Khan's "horsenality" LOL with a push button one,I would not complain - at all. But then I would never have got to know you lot so - swings and roundabouts??
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 2, 2012 5:09:33 GMT
Sometimes I think we get the horse we need not the one we want!
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Post by snigsby on Jun 2, 2012 9:39:07 GMT
Well,beks,you could be onto something there. I have certainly had to change the extent of my own comfort zone!
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 3, 2012 5:42:32 GMT
A mixed bag yesterday - both mum & L had to talk me into staying on board at several points on our ride. Just overwhelming fear again over nothing really - will try to listen to the CD's again. I don't seem to have any spare time at the moment as rushing round constantly. Also Jake has finally reached that time of year when he grows his shoes off. Farrier due on Thursday but whether the shoes will remain on til then is another matter - seemed to happen overnight!
Have alot on at the moment especially at work (very emotionally draining) and I think this is impacting on my riding. Problem is I can't not ride - Jake is the size of a small barrage balloon despite restricted grazing so has to be worked for at least and hour & a half a day. GW just isn't enough.
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Post by quest on Jun 3, 2012 8:11:22 GMT
Beks if you feel the need to get off, do so regardless of what anyone says even if God himself told you to. If you don't you no longer enjoy your ride or your horse. Jake should be your time out, relaxation and re charge to get on with the world. I doubt work will get Jakes figure back, if he gets worries he may be eating (because it's there) to stock up for the next time he "meets the tigers"
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 3, 2012 11:11:34 GMT
Actually I need to make an apology - I can do enough GW to keep Jake ticking over. Because his feet are a bit ropey mum suggested just working in the sand school today. So she rode Josh there & then lunged him (Josh is always better lunged in company!). I walked Jake in-hand and then worked him. O.M.G. my horse was brilliant. Totally with me mentally & physically. I have never seen him work in such a good outline, he worked long & low to start and then rounded up - this is just in a halter & 12ft rope. He held correct flexion on circles (left better than right but then he is a little stiffer on the right rein). Lateral work was good too. Chanced some canter work (had over-reach boots on all round due to his clonky shoes & raised clenches) - soft, light and working from behind. Suddenly mum says "he is looking the best I've ever seen him - he's not fat, just looking really well - I think the change of environment has done him the world of good" And she's right, Jake is a completely different horse since we've moved, he's developing a rather cheeky personality, asks for scratches and in many ways he is so much more relaxed now there's just him & Josh. Plus he has grass - he is ignoring hay at the moment, he only gets 1 lb a day - yep this is Jake, Mr Food "I'll kill anyone who looks at my hay net" Aggressive ;D Yesterday was a blip, like I said work & other stuff I need to leave at the yard gate got in the way, but sometimes things & people just affect you more than others. Horses are MY re-charge time and I need to remember that. GW always grounds me (pardon the pun) so I need to get back to doing more with Jake, I always used to do a bit before I rode at the old yard - guess I got out of the habit as we don't have a school on site.
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 5, 2012 19:26:52 GMT
Well he'd thrown a front shoe - guess it was too much to ask for all 4 to stay on until Thursday. So opted to take him & Josh down the school again for some gentle GW. Sadly he was just a little short on the affected foot - not lame or nodding, just feeling it a bit. Was OK on straight lines so decided not to work him. Ended up playing with Josh for mum - have put that bit in Josh's diary!
New shoes on Thursday - then lots of work!!
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 9, 2012 18:36:26 GMT
Little bit of riding and more GW today. Jake is looking well & feeling it! I'm pleased with the GW, though I'm sure clinic will show up what bad habits I've fallen into over the past year!
He was grumpy with Josh today - felt he was working too close to us. Jake did have a go at him but I redirected the energy and Jake listened which was good. Funnily enough they will often stand in the yard & in the field right next to each other, sometimes touching and its no problem. Somehow there were different boundaries today which neither me or mum were aware of.
Jake is very forward (for him!) at the moment, which I am finding a little difficult to deal with. I'm not entirely sure why because its not a negative energy he's putting out. Mum has said that when hacking if I see something that I think Jake may respond to or he suddenly looks up at something, I go so tight its palpable - no wonder Jake then tenses up too. I need to find a way of not reacting when Jake does because it then becomes a vicious cycle of each of us reacting to the other. Must listen to the confident rider CD again to reinforce all that positive stuff.
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Post by kas on Jun 9, 2012 19:34:48 GMT
Things are still getting better Becks, and I think your groundwork will put me to shame. Keep on doing what you're doing.
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 10, 2012 5:16:35 GMT
"I think your groundwork will put me to shame"
Somehow I think not kas, having watched you with your horses over the past few years, but thank you for the compliment. I know my GW has improved, we are more tuned in to each other, I can even move those sticky shoulders these days and sometimes I barely need to lift the rope to suggest a direction which is cool. Our lateral GW needs some work, though its pretty OK in the saddle. I just get impatient with myself at what I see as a lack of progress - just can't always see where I've come from.
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 10, 2012 14:53:13 GMT
A good day (about bloody time ;D)
Lovely hack for about an hour. No challenges or unauthorised dismounts. Jake forward but not unsettling me, so I guess I was pretty relaxed throughout. Anyhow it felt good.
Now working on my seat as I've gone back to over-weighting the right seat-bone & leg - with all this fear-based stuff it's almost as if I've gone back my default settings. Tipped forward and weight to the right. So lots of visualisation and being very aware of my position at all times.
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 11, 2012 11:23:53 GMT
Another good ride - got out early before the heavens opened thankfully. Jake very very chilled - kept grunting and sighing for the whole hack, that usually indicates he's feeling relaxed. Only met one tractor with a trailer full of bleating sheep on the back. Jake not bothered in the slightest, mum took Josh back down the hill & found a handy gateway to give Josh some more space. All controlled and no anxiety from horses or riders so that was good. A little spooked on the way home by what I initially thought was the hounds of hell chasing the horses but on closer inspection was actually two tiny Jack Russells who ran up behind us barking. I know their owner, who will be mortified that they got out & did this, as they do bark but don't usually chase after horses. Jake & Josh both jumped at first at the racket these two were making, but once they realised it was just dogs they ignored them. The dogs realising that their fun was over just went home. And we carried on our way.
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Post by beksnjake on Jun 14, 2012 19:16:47 GMT
Three words : MY HORSE ROCKS Did some GW in our field today after working Josh. Jake was soft responsive & forward. Sticky shoulders? What sticky shoulders, moves them with just a small gesture from me (bet we won't get that at clinic!). Canter from a whisper. Very very happy. Mum knocked out by what we're doing, says we seem to have a real connection now, which makes my fear when riding so odd - I have control of my horses feet, Jake listens to me, is with me so why do I get so fearful. Had a bit of a lightbulb moment and realised that this actually has very little to do with riding or horses - it's all to do with other things in my life which bother me but I feel I can't control - somehow this has begun to interfere with my riding. So some work to do there. Did I say MY HORSE ROCKS
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