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Post by snigsby on Oct 31, 2012 17:15:44 GMT
I think this is how fishermen make nets.
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Post by nicxf on Nov 5, 2012 22:25:22 GMT
Back in Wiltshire, Nix had finally wrestled the mattress in to place and was trying to work out how she'd ended up in Wiltshire. She.was sure the last time she checked she'd been in Gloucestershire... ;D
...Shrugging it off as an Unsolvable Mystery, she checked that she'd packed a good selection of crochet hooks, swore at her phone 'till the satnav app started to work, then headed determinedly off in the direction of Steptford. After a while she stopped, entered the correct Stepford into the map, and set off again. If there was knitting happening then gosh darn it (snigger), she was going to be a part of it.
"Knitting, schmitting" she muttered as she drove. "I'll show that Farelli woman and her freaky ponies that less is more - who needs knitting needles when you have a crochet hook?"
As she finally approached Stepford having abandoned the satnav after it mysteriously crapped out a few miles out of town, she noticed something very odd. A line of immaculately dressed women were lined up outside the town hall, watched by an equally immaculate row of horses. The women appeared to be attempting to knit using parsnip sticks, while the horses waved their heads hypnotically to the clacking rhythm.
Oh, Shi...." thought Nix, as two rows of empty eyes turned to face her and suddenly she couldn't remember what she'd come to show them after all.
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Post by quest on Nov 6, 2012 22:08:09 GMT
Huuug..... Seeker came too with a start. Where was she. Mincy was grazing happily beside her. Darn it she thought I must have got off because Mincy was worried and now I can't get back on. What was it Belinda said? Ah that's it she would take Mincy in and train her to lie down so I can just step aboard. She could also have her own hand knitted rug. Trouble is, Stove is doing all that work with the Tri-Pony-Patented-Mounting-Device that I was so excited about. What to do??? I'll contact Kos and ask her. She can get on all her ponies with no trouble at all.
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Post by beksnjake on Nov 7, 2012 21:23:55 GMT
"Oh no" wailed Poshnbeks " due to the awful weather this summer, there's no sloes anywhere - how am I going to make any sloe-gin?" She snivelled for a little while and then pulled her self together, wiped her nose on the back of her glove. "Perhaps those nice folks in Stepford have had more luck, where was that flyer about the knitting circle. . . . "
Meanwhile in the field a love-sick Corporal Quinn was serenading the gorgeous new Welsh mare that had just moved in next door. She however was rather more hip & down with the kids than him & was more interested in One Flexion (the new colt band) so was trying to ignore the bad Terry Thomas impression happening across the fence
"Well hello" said Corporal Quinn. . . . . . . .
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Post by kas on Nov 8, 2012 18:39:24 GMT
Tee Pee carefully lowered Kos on to Celebridee's back, holding the rope attached to the winch tightly in her teeth. "Cheers pony!" said Kos, leaning over to give her a scratch while Celebridee pulled uneasy faces. He was never comfortable when that ample rump turned towards him. (That's Tee Pee's ample rump people, not mine!). "OK Nags!" Kos turned Celebridee's golden head towards the west, "it's time to head to Stepford to find out what the buzz is about over there. Got the knitting bag Fin?" Fin nodded and whickered. "Got the cake Tee Pee?" Tee Pee spun round to display two panniers full of Tupperware containers. "Cool! It will take us three days to get to Stepford, so we'd better make a start!".
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Post by quest on Nov 8, 2012 21:43:47 GMT
The date of the freestyle knitting test was soon to be announced. A venue had to be agreed and ladycentaur had to be found and an order to be placed for chocolate brownies. Also it was believed poshnjakes were having trouble with the sloe gin as all the sloes have mysteriously disappeared, so at the moment the exhibition and demonstration were looking decidedly shakey. Some good organisation skills were needed, but who to contact?
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Post by beksnjake on Nov 8, 2012 21:56:44 GMT
"Look" said the gorgeous new Welsh mare "I'm not your darling - the name is L-to-the-R-to-the-D (said in a slightly lilting Welsh accent), not my dear!"
"LARD!" said Corporal Quinn "What kind of name is that my dear?" whilst thinking "at least she's now talking to me, even if I can't quite understand what she is saying"
"Not Lard" sighed L-R-D "L-to-the-R-to-the-D - I'm welsh you see, and my full name is full of double constanants and unprounceable syllables"
"Ahh I see" said Corporal Quinn, although he really didn't.
Meanwhile Poshnjakes was busy making lists of lists of lists as she planned her trip to Stepford. "I wonder if I could visit Silverends on the way over" she mused.
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Post by quest on Nov 9, 2012 21:56:50 GMT
Mincy hummed a Dorris Dance tune to herself, practicing a few steps while she considered the best hoof oil to wear - the gold glitter or silver glitter. She wanted to look her best for HIM at the knitting festival. The thing is, would Seeker be able to get on or not. Belinda is offering to teach her (Mincy) to lie down so Seeker can step aboard, and although she would get to wear one of the Belinda Farelli jumpers, Mincy was not too happy about this. Why couldn't Seeker learn to lean on her neck and then she could toss her beautiful neck and throw Seeker into position. It could look really good with her beautiful mane flying, though it was quite likely Seeker would fall straight off and the whole effect would be spoilt. Still not long now before the big event.
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Post by snigsby on Nov 11, 2012 20:20:18 GMT
Sighing,young JR Owing slammed shut his laptop. He just knew there had to be some kind of maths to work out the pros and cons of using Lee's new renewable energy versus planet-destroying oil but how to figure it out? He's already tried phoning Outtolunch but his old pal was,in fact,out to lunch so he'd had to leave a message.
Inspiration struck! There was probably an app for it! So who better to ask than Lee herself.
Meantime,he'd better deal with his mom. The Oddbins bills were getting frightening. They needed money - and fast.
Up in Scotland,an unusual calm pervaded the atmosphere. Humming quietly to herself,Snags loaded up the car with crisps,energy drinks and Sanatogen for the long trip ahead. BB lounged,snoring,in the back of the trailer. Even Khan't (the handsome Arab) was standing in there,sulking, regretting his over fondness for a ripe banana which had lure him into That Thing. As he gazed sullenly around,he caught a whiff from BB's new Marelli Farelli coat. "Cor, that doesn't half niff" he thought,as his eyelids strted to droop......
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Post by kas on Nov 17, 2012 21:31:36 GMT
"I can't do it! I can't do it! I caaaan't do it!" jittered Fin as he neatly evaded having his Farelli hand-knitted rug put on. "Oh fer goodness sake Little Man" sighed Kos "it's only a rug it won't hurt you". She decided to put it on Celebrideee instead, he was really good to rug and it was a shame not to use hand-kintted gifts from the Farelli camp. Relations between Farelli Horsemantricks and Silverend Ranch had been strained since Philip Spry (fuckin' legend) had dramatically reclaimed the lovely Stardust in a blaze of publicity and taken her and El Stalliano Diaboloso home with him. Celebrideee sniffed the rug, snorted, boggled his eyes and leapt neatly 10 feet to the right. If Fin said it was dangerous then he wasn't having anything to do with it either. In the background Tee Pee sniggered, she never wore rugs, she had her own.
Jonty Robarts poured a coup of fruit tea and handed it to Nellie. He had a troubled look on his face that was serious enough to draw her attention away from choosing her next nail colour. "There's something not quite right here Nellie. Those horses, don't you think they're just TOO good?". Nellie raised an immaculately shaped eyebrow and laughed. "Oh Jonty, what do you mean? The horses here are just Perfect, the sort of Partner I've always wanted. I'm thinking about taking Cornish Pasty along to the next knitting circle meeting". "Oh Nellie," Jonty shook his head sadly "I'm not sure, I mean - apart from anything else - can Pasty actually knit??".
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Post by kas on Nov 17, 2012 21:38:48 GMT
Intermission. I can't believe I found this.
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Post by beksnjake on Nov 18, 2012 19:41:50 GMT
Neither can I!!!
Sent from my HTC Wildfire using proboards
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Post by beksnjake on Nov 18, 2012 22:01:41 GMT
Meanwhile Poshnjake had got distracted on her way to Stepford & ended up in Birmingham where the world famous Espana Ecole du Waltzing Pones were giving a demonstration.
"WOW" said Poshnjake "these Pones are amazing, so well behaved & perfect, like the Stepford Ponies but somehow different. . . .can't quite work out why . . . . " as one of the walltzing pones turned round and took off his riders hat with smirk on its face. "Oh you naughty pone" said the espana ecole rider (in a european accent of indistinct origin) as he fed his pone sugar lumps "you are such a cheeky personality!"
A light bulb went on above Poshnjake's head.
"Who put that on?" she exclaimed.
"O.M.G" as the penny dropped (& other such cliches) "PERSONALITY - that's the difference - these pones are all individuals!" She had to quickly find somewhere to sit and take a swig from her For Emergency Use Only hip flask of Sloe Gin. "What is going on in Stepford?" (cue eerie "duh duh duh" type music)
She then bumped into Marl Vespa & his protege Lott O'Garden who were riding their equally well behaved & perfect but with individual personality horses. "I think we have a problem in Stepford - what are the Farelli's up to?" Poshnjake's muttered to herself "I need to get to Silverends & speak to Stove"
Meanwhile back at home Corporal Quinn was still trying to impress L.R.D (the beautiful Welsh mare) - he had some new moves he'd learnt off the interne(igh)t. "My dear - look at this" he called as he attempted to capriole. . . . . . .
. . . . . . "oh purrrrlease" said L.R.D as she rolled her eyes as Corporal Quinn finished his new move and quietly walked over to the other side of the field, trying not to hobble. "Needs a little more work - not quite as young as I was" he called whilst thinking "should have stuck to the singing"
(sorry but 14 hours on a coach does this to you!!)
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Post by nicxf on Nov 21, 2012 8:28:16 GMT
;D
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Post by nicxf on Nov 21, 2012 9:13:47 GMT
"fwazzat???" Nix woke up suddenly, not entirely clear on what had happened. Looking around, she appeared to be lying on a pile of straw in a stable. "Funny sort of stable, though" she thought. "Where's the smell of horses, and the poo stains down the walls?" It looked brand new, but scuff marks on the floor and some teeth marks on the edge of the water bowl suggested it had seen use. Nix was thirsty, so took a closer look at the water bowl. "Yuk!"She exclaimed, after dipping her fingers in. It was full of oil, not water! "weird..." she mused. She tried to think. The last thing she really remembered was chucking her phone / malfunctioning satnav into the back of the van in disgust after it myseriously stopped working, a move that now seemed rather rash as she couldn't call for help. She tried shouting for a while, but no-one appeared. the door was firmly bolted from the outside, and not even one of her trusty crochet hooks could prise it open. A plastic bag had been used to cover the outside of the window so she couldn't even see where she was. "MAPLIN" it said on the bag. Nix thought this was rather strange. You'd expect to see a feed or wood shavings bag being used in a stable, not one from an electronics superstore, she thought. Sitting back down on the straw, Nix decided to ponder her options, and hope in the meantime that one of her friends might find her abandoned van and come looking for her.
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